Hi, my name is Chris. I live and kvetch in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
Having retired from zapping protozoa with electrical stimuli, I spend most of my time drinking chai tea at cafés and running around in parks. I studied philosophy in college and applied for graduation upon discovering that I don’t exist.
My other past times include fixing up my old house and reading old books. I write meandering essays, half-inadvertently make people laugh, and take notice of the small things.
If I were a car, I’d probably be a yellow Volvo from the 1980s. Ideally, it would be in running condition.
- A respectful love letter to David Brooks
- Comedians and truth
- Deadly speech
- I can’t even
- In defense of messiness
- In defense of pasteurization
- In praise of safety razors
- Is public radio for squares?
- Letter to Barnes & Noble
- Letter to Target
- Literally literally
- Marshmallows and miscreants
- Naked in papal regalia
- Public speaking
- Self-censorship and social media
- The dress is neither blue nor white
- Three stupid words
- Was Ray Kroc a prescriptivist?
- Yoga mats